How to Safely Explore Kinky Fantasies in the Bedroom

How to Safely Explore Kinky Fantasies in the Bedroom

How to Safely Explore Kinky Fantasies in the Bedroom

Whether you have been with your significant other for a number of years and you start to feel that the flame of romance has begun to vain or you just want to take things to the next level in the bedroom, some kinky sex can be a great option to try out. Of course, it can be a bit uncomfortable for certain people to discuss their fantasies openly and it can be difficult to bring up the subject for fear of catching your partner unprepared and coming off as a pervert. However, if you approach the subject with subtlety and take small steps initially, you will be able to unlock a whole new world of pleasure for you and your partner. The following points can be used as guidelines for exploring your wild side in the bedroom safely.

Develop trust before sharing your fantasies

It is a bit risky to bring up the idea of rough sex or bondage on your first date, but people often find it uncomfortable even after a few months of dating. If you are able to communicate your feelings to your partner and you two share a deep bond, then it is much easier to confide in them and reveal your fantasies, even if they are a bit unconventional. The best thing to do is waiting for a while before talking about these things if you aren’t sure how your partner feels about kinky sex.

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Talk about what turns you on and where your boundaries are

Once you have established a foundation of trust and you feel comfortable discussing more intimate topics and sharing some of your secret fantasies, it is time to have an honest talk about what turns each of you on and what turns you off. Some things may be a deal breaker for the other person, so it is wise to approach the subject carefully. Start talking about sexual fantasies and fetishes in general and ask the other person how they feel about them. It can be a fun little conversation where you find out a bit about each other’s past sexual encounters and learn about the things that you always wanted to do but never had a chance to. You will be able to find some common ground after a while, and you can begin to consider some of the sexual acts that both of you would be into.

Start off light

Unless one of you has had some previous experience in this sort of thing or you both feel comfortable with more advanced forms of BDSM, it is best to take things slow and start off fairly light. Some light and commonly practiced acts of BDSM include light bondage, teasing and orgasm denial, light spanking, tickling, biting, etc. You can simply tie your partner’s arms and legs and put a blindfold on them, whipping them lightly with a whip specifically designed to make a loud snapping sound without causing much physical damage.

sexy handcuffs

You can tickle, pinch, bite or slap your partner lightly, reading their reactions and asking them if they are comfortable with the level of pain or a particular sensation. During dominance play, it is important to find out if the submissive partner can take verbal as well as physical abuse, whether they are comfortable with being dominated or humiliated and to what extent are they willing to go. Remember, it is supposed to be sexy and fun, so be careful not to go too far. With a little bit of experimentation, you will be able to find exactly what turns you and your partner on the most and set boundaries. Agree on the safe word before your session and make sure you pause from time to time and ask the submissive partner if they want to continue and how hard they want to proceed.

Understand your partner’s limits and know when to stop

Even with something as seemingly innocent as tickling, it is easy to get carried away in your power fantasy and make the submissive feel very uncomfortable, to the point where they break into hysteria and are unable to calm themselves down even after the tickling has stopped. The idea is not to injure or otherwise physically or emotionally harm the partner – you should never push someone beyond what they can take. Ideally, you would keep the person on the edge of what they can take and make the exciting experience last as long as you can, but this requires a deep understanding between the two partners. This can only be achieved through practice and plenty of communication. Talking to your partner during the act is important, but you will also need to take the time to sum up your experiences afterwards. You will learn a lot of valuable information about each other – most people learn a lot of new things about themselves in the process as well.

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Sometimes you won’t be into the same things

After you’ve had your talks and perhaps tried out a few things, you may find out that although one of you gets incredibly exited during your bondage sessions, the other one may be uncomfortable with it. You’ll need to be honest with each other if you want to find a way for both of you to experience maximal pleasure. Try reversing the roles – one night you can be the dominant and your partner gets to dominate you the next time. You can also try out something a bit different, but ultimately if you or your partner simply don’t find the experience enjoyable, it is best to leave it alone.

Exploring some of the kinkier fantasies you may have is a perfectly natural thing, and a lot more common than people think. The trick is to be honest with your partner, starts off slow and work on finding what works best for the both of you.

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